Thursday, August 24, 2006

How would YOU respond?

Background: DH and I have been very involved in a small group Bible study for nearly 6 years. The last 2 have not been so fulfilling as before. Too much drama, not enough heart. Troubles with wife of the couple that leads.

Anyhow, last December, we suffered a very tragic loss of my BIL. Life has just not been the same, which is totally normal, according to my counselor friend, and another friend who lost her brother 2 years ago. This woman, and a handful of others from church just don't seem to understand why we aren't just bouncing back into everything we had been involved in before.

Fast forward to this afternoon. This woman asked me to keep her 3yo DD while she worked with a homebound student for about 2 hours. I have a 3yo DS and so I agreed, and they were great, played together. Well, she comes back to get her, and I TRY to make small talk to be friendly. As she leaves, she asks whether we are coming to small group picnic on Sunday. I say no.
She then asks when are we coming back to small group? I say, "I don't know." Then SHE SAYS... "well, I'll just keep asking til you feel guilty."

WHAT????? Seriously, does she think that makes me want to come back sooner? I responded with a simple. "I don't feel guilty." I refuse (at least I'm trying to refuse) to let ANYONE guilt me into anything!

So, how would you have responded?

I mean, I am just sick to death of trying to befriend this person. We just don't mesh! I can't feel "safe" sharing with her in an intimate setting... it's impossible! So I really feel that when we DO decide to return to a small group--it will be in a different group. GRRRR

1 comment:

Donna B. said...

that sounds awful; obviously there's not a lot of 'heart' and wonder if you've been given support with your loss from anyone at your church. I think you responded appropriately and if she decides to talk with you about it again, let her know how you feel. She can't correct her insensitivity if she doesn't realize that's what she dishing out. Pray about it. I hope it all works out for you. Donna